


That's the Way it Crumbles - Cookie Wise

by anarchycox



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bakers, Best Friends, College professors, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Loving relationships, M/M, Magic Realism, Merlin is grumpy, No Real Angst, eggsy wants everyone to be in love and happy, falling in love over cookies and scones, harry is a little extra, look this will just be super sweet, not spies, percival has a speech impediment, simply irresistible esque
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-24
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-01-22 13:19:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 18,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12482512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anarchycox/pseuds/anarchycox
Summary: A soft and sweet story about a baker with a speech impediment who bakes his emotions into his creations. Everyone knows this and accepts it. Except newcomer to town Professor Harry Hart who is rather confused by it all. He does know that Percival is gorgeous and he rather wants to take the quiet man out and if he gains a stone from eating baked goods so be it. Far worse things have been done for love.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Ana_Kagetsu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ana_Kagetsu/gifts).



> this was won in a contest on my blog, just a quiet love story with a wee bit of magic to it.

He liked his routine.

It was simple, orderly.

Solitary.

Not lonely no matter what Roxy said.

Alarm at 3:45am.

Showered, dressed and in the bakery kitchen by 4:25am at the latest. 

Roll up the sleeves of his shirt and put an apron on over the shirt and tie. Yes he was overdressed for 4:30am baking, he knew this. But it made him happy, like he respected his products.

Put some coffee on and check on the overnight proofs and get them ready for the next step. Look at the board to see what to bake. Sip coffee and change out the lemon muffins for an apple one. It felt like an apple sort of day. He got to work and didn’t even have music on.

He liked the quiet.

The sky lightened where he couldn’t see it and he knocked at the bottom of bread that came out of the ovens and smiled at the perfect sound.

He made scones and for some reason thought about a vacation to Bermuda he had taken when 20. He smiled as he cut them. They came out fluffy and perfect.

Roxy stumbled in at 6:30 and went straight for the coffee before putting on her apron. She reached for a muffin and he stopped her.

“Wha?”

He handed her a scone instead. She bit in and sighed in content. “You were happy, nostalgic when you made these. They taste like a memory.”

He kissed her head and broke off a corner for himself. Good. People deserved a happy feeling today.

He took trays of bread to the front of the store and loaded the display. He put the large coffee pot on and saw Merlin already at the door even though they wouldn’t open for 10 minutes. He took pity on the man and unlocked the door. Merlin sat at a table.

“Fucking trojan horse,” Merlin muttered. “Up all night, didn’t make it home to Eggsy. Coffee and despair please.”

He rolled his eyes and poured Merlin a cup of coffee and cut him a slice of a danish. He had been thinking about a lost love when he had made it. He gave it to Merlin who took a bite and nodded. “Good,” he grunted even as wiped away a tear. “Good.” He ate in silence and went behind the counter to refill his coffee and disappeared a few doors down to his computer repair shop.

He finished filling the shelves and wiped the counter.

Roxy came out and took the chalkboard outside.

Percival nodded, it would be a good day today. He could feel it.

***************************************

“Hello,” Harry called out. He was supposed to be meeting Mister Unwin but no one was there. He started to walk around the museum a little bit, impressed with the displays.

“Avast ye mateys!” A man shouted as he jumped out in front of Harry in full pirate gear.

Harry didn’t even blink. “You are wearing the sash wrong,” he pointed out.

“Oh shut it, the kids love my pirate,” he answered.

Harry adjusted his shoulders a little bit and held his umbrella like a sword. “Avast ye mateys,” he said in a low and threatening voice.

“So that was brilliant, felt chills in my spine,” he grinned. “I’m Eggsy Unwin, and I’m guessing you’re Professor Hart.”

“Harry, please,” Harry replied. “You were rather insistent about an appointment.”

Eggsy took off his pirate hat and lead Harry to his tiny office. “Yup. The Uni and us have always had a partnership and you being the new guy in charge of the Music and Theatre Arts programme, figured we should meet. Want some coffee?”

“Thank you, one sugar and a splash of milk,” Harry replied and took a seat. Eggsy poured out from the tiny four cup machine he had in the corner and put out a few biscuits as well. “Anyways, I’m the children’s and events coordinator for the museum and we regularly use your students for when we do little skits, all volunteer and looks good on their resumes.”

“I didn’t know this,” Harry said. “I should know this.”

“The bloke before you, Chester, was sort of shite at paperwork, or knowing what was going on. And he was an arse. The whole world was grateful from the school pensioned him off and he moved back to London.” Eggsy bit into a biscuit and giggled. “Sorry, didn’t realize these were happy cookies,” he said like he expected Harry to understand what he meant. “Anyways, figured since you were new you might like to know what your students and some of your staff help out with. And see if maybe you wanted to help out too. You actually ever do any theatre or always been on the academic side?”

“I have done a little theatre work yes, a long time ago,” Harry said. He was curious and took a biscuit. It looked like a normal butter cookie. He bit in and a huge grin broke out over his face. He felt almost euphoric. He stopped the laugh that tried to escape.

“At least they aren’t the rage chocodoodles am I right?” Eggsy bit and laughed again. “Not for a first meeting. No matter that Merlin loves them, grumpy gus he is.”

Harry finished the biscuit, the smallest laugh finally escaping. “Merlin?”

“My husband,” Eggsy explained. He turned a photo on his desk to show Harry.

Harry stared in surprise. “Good lord, that’s Hamish Hamish.”

Eggsy stared back. “You’re where that nickname comes from?” His brain lined up all the information. “Oh my god, you’re Galahad.”

Harry groaned a bit. “I am.”

“I am texting him. Shit, can’t believe it’s you,” Eggsy’s thumbs were flying. “Eat another biscuit.” He put his phone down and it pinged a minute later. Eggsy snorted when he picked it up. “Yeah, you’re coming for dinner tonight. He says you owe him 20 quid.”

“Lies,” Harry said. But he was grinning. “I’ll come on one condition. You give me the recipe for these cookies.”

“Didn’t make them, bruv. We’re friends with a baker. Morton’s Morsels.” Eggsy gave him a card from somewhere in the desk. “Just...be careful. Ask Roxy for what a new person should go for.”

“Be careful?” Harry asked. It wasn’t the usual response for a bake shop.

Eggsy didn’t say anything more, just talked about Halloween plans for the museum and how he wanted Harry to help. They bickered over the plans for an hour and Harry felt satisfied by the end that it would be an interesting partnership.

Harry went back to his office, which was still being cleared out of King’s crap. He pitied the grad student that had to sort all the files. He went to a few other meetings and did his best to prepare for the classes that would start soon. As chair he only had two classes, but still he looked forward to teaching them. It was quickly approaching the 6pm that he was supposed to be at the address Eggsy had texted him. Harry decided that the recommended bake shop wasn’t too far and that he should bring a host gift.

He walked about, and only took a wrong turn once, finally getting a feel for the neighbourhood. He was at the shop in 20 or so minutes and looked at the front. It was a charming space. A simple grey awning with black writing, large windows showing three small tables and the bakery display. A traditional bell rang as he opened the door.

A man came out of the back and smiled at him.

“Hello, I am going to a house for dinner and thought I should bring dessert. Mister Unwin recommended your shop. We had the ‘happy’ biscuits at his office. They were a delight.” The man just nodded a thank you.  Harry found himself talking more. “I’m Professor Hart. Harry. I am new to the area. Well newish, I moved to town a month ago. Been rather too busy to explore. But clearly that was a mistake.” He thought maybe the man was laughing at him just a little but he wasn’t saying anything. “Is a tie usual baker wardrobe?” Harry asked, looking at the Windsor knot just noticeable over the apron covered in chocolate smears and flour. The man just shrugged and adjusted the tie a bit, leaving some flour on it. “So...what should I bring Mr. Unwin and Mr. Weir?”

The baker disappeared into the back and Harry looked at the display. It was running low being the end of the day, but there were some delicious looking cream tarts. The man returned with a box. He saw where Harry was looking and just shook his head.

“They look delicious,” Harry protested. “2 please, of the custard tarts.”

The man shook his head again and held up the box. 

Harry thought he understood. “No, I know that is for taking, but I was thinking those for myself.”

The baker shook his head more vehemently. He pointed and took Harry to the other case, with macarons in it.

Harry wondered if the tarts were near to going off or something. “Very well, a few of those then.”

The baker smiled and packed them up. He took both boxes to the counter and rang it up. The register had a large display and the man pointed at the total. Harry thought it bizarre but handed over the cash. The man returned the change and disappeared into the back.

3 blocks of his walk later, Harry realized the man had never said a word.

At the dinner after insults and history were told by Merlin and Harry that had Eggsy in stitches the dessert was brought out.

Eggsy grinned happily. “Lavender fairy cakes, Merlin.”

“Just half,” Merlin replied. “Ye know what they do to me.”

Eggsy gave him half a fairy cake and took a whole for himself. He took a bite and a blush rose in his cheek. “Not too loaded,” he said. “Harry you want one?”

“Loaded?” He looked to Merlin who was also flushed and had a sparkle in his eye. “Ahhh, laced with alcohol are they?”

“Something like that,” Eggsy agreed.

“No then,” Harry demurred. He didn’t like liquor flavoured desserts. He drank a dram of whiskey while they sat and continued their story telling. It was a pleasant night and he and Merlin arranged a lunch meeting later in the week.

He went home and decided to eat a couple of the macarons.

Harry put on some music and danced about. When he was in bed later, he wondered at that. He hated dancing alone.

And he had forgot to ask the other men about the rather odd baker.

No matter, he could ask Merlin later.

**************************************************

Percival closed the shop at precisely 700pm. He cleaned the front and then checked on the breads he had earlier to proof overnight. He checked his inventory and made some notes on his board. He went upstairs to his flat and had a shower and ate a late sandwich and read a book.

Roxy would be mad that he hadn’t said a word all day.

But perhaps she wouldn’t find out.

He was in bed at 10:00pm. Lights out at 10:15pm.

He had been right. It had been a good day, all in all.

He wondered if the macarons had made the stranger dance.


	2. Chapter 2

Harry woke up in a panic. He had his first department meeting today. That he was in charge of. Shit, they were going to realize they had made a huge mistake hiring him to be the chair and fire him out of hand. He’d never work again. He would have to give up this tiny house he and bought and adored. The garden was perfect for a dog, if he were ever to have the chance to get one. He’d be on the street and offering to recite Shakespeare for food.

He phone buzzed and he looked at the text.

_ Stop panicking like this is an exam for Professor Mildred. Put on one of your hundred suits, go to Morsels and get some muffins and you’ll be fine _ .

Harry smiled. He hadn’t realized how much he had missed Merlin in the years that they had lost touch. But a decade apart and the bastard still knew him well.

_ Wanker _ , he texted back.

He laughed at the gif he was sent back of an otter sticking out its tongue.

Right. He could do this. Harry showered and got ready for the day and stared at the wardrobe. One thing he had to do for the house was improve the closets. They were dreadful. He’d maybe do a nice custom build. Merlin and Eggsy must know someone to hire. He was starting to get well settled in, his butterflies on the wall and the lorry with his furniture had finally arrived. The little cottage was starting to look like him. 

Harry packed up his briefcase and checked his reflection and headed in. He would never admit that Merlin was right about anything or that he took the man’s advice but he found himself soon enough parking in front of  _ Morsels _ . He stepped out of the car and went into the shop.

“Ohh,” he said softly. The place smelled nutty, and a little dark. A mix of sweet and bitter. It was divine.

“It’s the coffee blend, when it and the banana nut muffins are both fresh, makes the place smell like what you always pictured a grandmother’s house smelling like,” the girl said. She was petite but moving trays of baked goods like they weighed nothing. “So, Professor Hart, what can I do you for?”

“I’m sorry?” He stared at her. “Do I know you?”

“No, but I’m friends with Eggsy’s and he is still in stitches about you being this long lost friend of Merlin’s, heard about you for days,” she smiled. “Roxy, co-manager of the shop.”

“Harry, please. I have a meeting today, I thought it would be good to bring something along. The muffins perhaps?” He looked at the tray she had just brought out.

“No, a new guy can’t handle these babies,” she said. “Hang on. Uncle Percy, new guy, needs a box to take to a meeting. How many people?”

“Um 5. 6 including myself,” he said.

“Right,” she nodded. “6 people breakfast meeting treats. One at least is a newbie,” she shouted back again.

“What does my being relatively new to town have to do with baked goods?” Harry asked puzzled.

Roxy just smiled and winked at him. Harry was ready to press her for more answers but then the baker in the tie came out. “Hello, again,” Harry said. He then realized one meeting a week ago with how many probably came through the shop, that it would be absurd the baker should remember him. “You wouldn’t sell me custards tarts, sent me off with macarons instead. And some lavender fairy cakes for Merlin and Eggsy.”

The baker began to silently giggle and Roxy rolled her eyes and swatted him. “You know what those do to Merlin.”

“I admit he looked rather...chipper after just a half one. I didn’t try, I don’t like desserts with alcohol in them,” Harry explained. He was puzzled when the man laughed silently even more and the girl started to snort as well.

“This is why he only eats depressed or angry desserts,” Roxy laughed some more. “So Uncle Percy, staff meeting what should he take? I said he couldn’t handle the banana nut.”

Percival nodded in agreement. He looked at the man carefully. 

Harry stared back. The baker was quite attractive really. Rather Harry’s type in fact. Harry held out a hand. “Harry Hart, new Department Chair of Music and Theatre at Falmouth.”

The man reached back and shook but didn’t return the greeting. He held Harry’s hand a moment too long.

“Uncle Percy,” Roxy whispered. “Come on, please?”

He let go of Harry’s hand and shook his head. He went to the display case and hummed a little bit as he selected.

Harry listened. It was off key, but charming. He watched items be put in a box and then handed to Roxy who rang it up. Harry paid and collected the box. “Well thank you. Is there anything I should know about these?”

“No nuts, since you don’t know if there are any allergies,” Roxy explained. “And they are from a pretty neutral batch.” She looked to her uncle to confirm. He nodded and then shrugged.

“Mostly neutral, nothing bad, seriously Merlin is the only one to eat those,” she explained. She looked out the window. “Speak of the devil.”

Merlin stomped in. “Mrs Fischer went to another damn webpage with her safeties off. Stupid, buggering. 4th time Roxy. And of course she expects me to fix it.”

“You will,” she pointed out. “And charge her like half of the cost.”

“Stupid old woman,” Merlin grumbled. “I need coffee and rejection.”

Harry rolled his eyes at the drama. The baker went over and pulled a loaf cake out. He cut a couple careful slices and packaged them up and handed it over to Merlin. Merlin took a small bite and frowned.

“Not good?” Harry asked, surprised, everything smelled so lovely. 

“Delicious,” Merlin said with a frown. “First year Uni. Donovan Shallows.”

“The man who was your first and then talked shit about you in the bar?” Harry frowned. “Why are you thinking about him?"

“Rejection, perfect mood for dealing with that damn computer,” Merlin said, shoulders just a little slumped. “Thanks, Percy. See you.” He took the coffee Roxy offered and left.

“He didn’t pay,” Harry pointed out.

“Often doesn’t,” Roxy said. “But he also fixes our computers because someone keeps forgetting to wash his hands before he uses the keyboard,” she gave her uncle a glare, who ignored it to put muffins in the display.

“Right. Well this was all slightly bizarre. So I’ll be off. Goodbye,” Harry said. He was at the door when he heard Roxy hit her uncle and hiss  _ say something _ .

“Percy,” the baker shouted. The sound echoed in the room.

Harry looked at him and smiled. The man looked mortified. Poor man was shy and his niece was forcing manners on him and it came out awkward and loud. “Goodbye, Percy,” Harry said. He wasn’t that surprised to get a wave instead of another word.

Harry went to his office and began his first meeting. Or he would have only the moment the professors saw the box from  _ Morsels _ they dove in.

Only one professor didn’t. “Professor…” shit Harry didn’t remember the man’s name. “No pastries for you?”

“Professor Cheswick, and no Professor Hart. Ate from them without warning once, never doing it again.”

“These are pretty neutral,” another professor added. “Not heavily loaded.”

Harry decided to not stand on ceremony and reached for the small cinnamon bun. He took a bite and felt a warm feeling arise in him. Anticipatory. He knew the meeting would go well. The felt like bouncing.

Must have been the sugar in the frosting.

“Well, then shall we talk about the new intake students?” Harry asked feeling just the smallest buzz under his skin.

The day just flew by and Harry when he got home still had a good bit of energy and managed to unpack three more boxes. The house was beginning to look perfectly cluttered. Like his. Harry made an easy dinner of grilled cheese and a small bag of crisps; a little sad perhaps but it suited well enough. He then curled into a chair and read for a while. He realized though that he had a hankering for something sweet. There were some hobnobs in the cupboard but they wouldn’t suit.

He looked at his trousers and sweater and decided he looked acceptable enough for a run out. He drove quickly to  _ Morsels _ and got to the door just as Percy was locking it. Harry made the saddest face ever. “Just a couple cookies? Please?” Harry made his eyes big and hopeful and then tried to smolder a bit. He used to smolder quite well on the stage.

Percy huffed but unlocked the door. Harry followed him in and Percy got a small bag and put some cookies in it barely looking at what he was putting in. He handed it to Harry.

“Thank you, I fear I am already becoming quite addicted to your baked goods,” Harry said. 

The man smiled just a little bit. He grabbed a piece of paper and wrote a quick note.

_ Eat them in this order:  _

 

_ Snickerdoodle _

_ Chocolate Chip _

_ Oatmeal Raisin _

_ Strawberry filling _

 

_ Do not eat the oatmeal raisin first. _

 

“Really, a cookie order?” Harry looked at it. “It is an ascending quality thing?”

Percival shook his head.

“What will happen if I dare eat the Oatmeal Raisin first?” Harry asked. Percival reached for the bag and Harry held it away. “I promise to behave. What do I owe you?”

Percival just waved it off and Harry figured he was happy to see end of the day product gone.

“Well thank you, for helping a poor soul out. Good night,” Harry gave him a nod and left.

When he got home he felt defiant and ate the Oatmeal Raisin first. He ended up rolling on the ground, and feeling about 6. It was the oddest thing to happen to him. And his mother had seen him perform Equus.

The next day he decided to pay a visit to Merlin at the man’s shop. It was a space that managed to be so neat and organized and yet completely cluttered. And the man was at the back of the shop, hands working on a circuit board.

“Merlin,” Harry greeted.

Merlin grunted and didn’t look up for another minute. And when he did, he just laughed. “You ate an oatmeal raisin one first didn’t you?”

“How?”

“Everyone has that look after they have one of those, if they didn’t do the build up first.” Merlin laughed at him some more. “Why I stick to the grumpy desserts. Don’t hit ye so hard. That or I am just extra sensitive to the happy ones.”

“I don’t understand,” Harry said, frustrated. “Something is different. Is it alcohol...are these drug desserts?"

“Percival Morton has nae had so much as a parking ticket,” Merlin said. “They are just baked goods. Baked with love, and passion, and frustration, and -”

“Yes, yes, I have watched the Great British Bake-Off,” Harry interrupted. “But you all speak about them like they are magic.”

“Well…” Merlin smiled at him. “Who am I to say they aren’t?”

“Magic isn’t real, and it certainly wouldn’t be found in a bakery in Cornwall,” Harry said firmly. “Now, I have to go teach people that Shakespeare’s comedies are actually funny.”

“Good luck with that,” Merlin said. “Maybe stop and buy a happy biscuit on your way in.”

“I am quite fine thank you,” Harry said. He left Merlin and walked right by the bake shop with no intention to stop. Only Percival was in front and writing on the chalkboard. He halted in his tracks. “I ate the oatmeal first, shouldn’t have done that,” Harry blurted out. Which was a rather absurd greeting. Right, and he wasn’t stopping at the odd little shop anyways. He decided to just keep moving.

Two blocks away there was a tap on his shoulder. Percival stood there, still in his apron, an orange streak on his cheek. He handed Harry a paper bag and then turned back and jogged back to the shop.

Harry went to the office and dropped off his things. He did his lecture and was busy for a few hours. He went back and saw the paper bag. He opened it up and the smell of lemon and poppy seed hit him. He pulled the mini muffin out of the bag and popped the whole thing in his mouth.

He never knew that a muffin could taste like an I told you so.

And he certainly wouldn’t have thought that that would amuse him as much as it did.


	3. Chapter 3

His alarm went at 3:45am and for once he wasn’t happy to be waking up. He had been dreaming about that new customer, Harry. It had been a pleasant dream and he would have liked to have stayed in it a while longer. He debated hitting the snooze button but he knew it wouldn’t recapture the feeling.

Percival showered and dressed and went down to his kitchen. He looked at his whiteboard and set the breads to second proof and got muffins and scones in the ovens, not even noticing what he was putting into them, his brain still focused on Harry and the dream. A dream where clothes had just been coming off.

He felt like traditional gingerbread and began to put the cake together. He found a chocolate stout in the fridge and pour a third into the batter. The clock said 5am. He shrugged and took a couple sips before switching back to his coffee. He decided to make it in his mini loaves pan and set it in to bake.

When Roxy arrived he was drizzling them with a little bit of frosting. “Oooh, you haven’t made gingerbread in forever, usually you wait until November,” she hurried over and picked up one of the tiny loaves that was barely the size of her palm. “Yay, Christmas,” she said and bit in. She moaned and Percival gave her a startled look. That was not a happy Christmas moan. That was the sort of moan she made with Tilde. Percival really wished he didn’t know that moan.

“Uncle Percy, were we thinking about someone when we made these?” Roxy asked carefully.

He shrugged and decided to go back to the cookie dough he was making.

Roxy dipped a finger in before he could slap her away.

“Sanitation!” He tried to just say it and winced when it came out as a yell. He cleared his throat and Roxy glared at him.

“One, you know you aren’t supposed to do that, and two these taste like sex too!” Roxy looked around at everything he had baked this morning. “Oh fuck, we can’t open the bakery today.”

“Why not?” he asked, pleased when it almost came out at a normal tone. More pleased at the smile his niece gave him.

“Remember last time?” Roxy said.

Percival blushed and started to doll out spoonfuls of cookie dough onto a sheet. “Correlation doesn’t equal causation,” he whispered. 

“8,” Roxy said. “8 babies born in 3 days, and oh look it was 9 months after the last time you sent out desserts all sexed up. That is disproportionate for our size of city.”

He refused to look at her and just kept up his prep work. Roxy was too practical to actually demand they stay closed for the day. He put the cookies in and tried a muffin and oh my yes, apparently that dream lingered more than he expected. If it was affecting him this much, there would be so many babies. Percival looked at Roxy in worry.

“I’m putting up a million warning signs,” she said and ate the rest of her tiny gingerbread loaf. “After I call Tilde.” She went upstairs to the flat.

Percival winced. “Please be quiet!” This time he absolutely meant it to be a shout. He was uncomfortable knowing it was his fault his niece was upstairs in his flat having phone sex. He heard a thump and decided to go load up the display cases, he was less likely to hear something there.

Perhaps he should have stayed in bed this morning.

********************************************

Harry had a busy morning, classes were off to a decent start, and he and the department secretary had finally sorted all the mess left behind by King. He decided he needed an afternoon reward and walked over to  _ Morsels _ .

The shop was quiet, which wasn’t that surprising, though Percival sitting at one of the tables inside reading a book was. Harry ignored the chalkboard sign, he always just took whatever the baker gave him.

Less easy to ignore was the sign on the door that read:

 

**_LAST WARNING_ **

**_BUYING TODAY’S PRODUCTS WILL INDUCE PREGNANCY OR AT LEAST INCREASED LIBIDO. WE TAKE NO RESPONSIBILITY IF YOU PURCHASE ANY PRODUCT TODAY. WE HAVE WARNED YOU._ **

**_IF YOU DO BUY ANYTHING WE RECOMMEND THE SPOTIFY PLAYLIST BAKER’S DOZEN SEX GROOVES_ ** **.**

 

Harry laughed at that. Clearly Roxy had decided to torture her uncle in some sort of joke that he didn’t understand but probably everyone else around here did. Never had he met a bake shop that was entrenched in mythos and joke like this one. He wondered if a cultural studies masters had been done on it yet. He’d have to look it up.

Harry opened the door and went on in. “Hello, Percy,” he said.

Percival looked at him in shock and horror and began to shake his head. He put his book down and went over and touched Harry’s shoulder. They stared at each other for a moment and then Percival tried to push him out of the shop.

“Really?” Harry asked. “I had a small victory at work and all I want is a reward muffin.” Harry looked at Percival. “Why are you blushing? Because of the signs. I admit I don’t quite get the joke.”

Percival just shook his head and opened the door and gestured for Harry to leave. But Harry dug his feet in. “Now really I am sorry, but whatever this mass delusion about your baked goods is, I don’t care. I want you to sell me a muffin.”

Percival looked at him. “Please!” he shouted right in Harry’s face. He turned more red and winced. He was done with words today. Eleven in one day was more than enough. He went behind the counter and began to fuss with tidying a perfectly clean space.

“I don’t think it warranted a shout like that,” Harry said.

Percival wouldn’t look at him.

“A muffin,” Harry said firmly. 

Percival looked at him and tried again, he mouthed the word  _ please _ but Harry ignored that. Finally Percival nodded and put a muffin in a bag for him. Harry paid and walked out without another word.

He went back to his office and made a cup of tea and sat down to write up his lecture notes for the next week and began to eat the muffin. He was eating it in very small bites so it took a bit of time for the feeling to course through him.

It was an itch, a thrum under his skin and by the end of the muffin he realized he was hard, and that his cock was pressing against his trousers. He hadn’t been having sexy thoughts. He had been thinking about Arthur Miller for heaven’s sake. Nothing sexy about that man or his plays.

Harry stared at the muffin and thought about the signs at the bakery. He got up and then looked at his lap. He sat back down and waited the couple minutes it took for things to go back to a more normal state. He then head to Merlin’s shop. Which it turned out had a sign of its own on the door:

 

_ We ate the gingerbread. _

_ Back sometime tomorrow when all sexed out _ .

 

Harry sent a text to Merlin and got no reply.

He rigged his phone so that the text would repeat every four minutes just to annoy the man. Harry then decided the only thing that was logical was to return to the bake shop. He waited until just a couple minutes before it would close and Roxy was there wiping the chalkboard down.

“Hello,” Harry said.

Roxy looked up from where she was crouched. “Hey,” she answered. “Hear you decided to buy something today.”

“What is going on here?” Harry asked. “Is it drugs, mass delusion, an elaborate in joke?”

“Or magic?” she suggested.

“I don’t believe in magic,” Harry protested.

“Ever get a parking spot when there were none to be seen?” she shot back. “Prayed your footie team got that last minute goal? What about find that sock that has been missing?”

“Luck, chance, not magic.”

“Are they so different?” Roxy stood up and waved at someone behind Harry. “And maybe one night a little boy wished on a shooting star that people could understand him so that he didn’t have to talk and it came true. As sometimes wishes do for those who believe enough and are pure of heart.”

“Real life isn’t a fairy tale,” Harry protested. He had seen enough to know that.

“Oh?” Roxy smirked at him and a sweet looking blonde walked past him and kissed Roxy firmly. “I have a bunch of stuff,” Roxy told her and the blonde blushed. Roxy looked at Harry. “See this woman? Rescued her, a princess, my damsel in distress, and we got happy ever after, seems pretty fairy tale to me.”

“I got a flat tire,” Tilde reminded her. “And I’m not a princess.”

“Were you a damsel? Did I rescue you? There was even a dragon!”

“A ticket officer is not a dragon,” Tilde said for the millionth time, but she was smiling. “Come on my knight in shining armor, let’s go home.” She began to drag Roxy away.

“Do not hurt Uncle Percy’s feelings because he has magic and you don’t!” Roxy shouted to him as she was dragged down the street. “And he’s likely maxxed out his words today anyways.”

Harry had no idea what that meant and walked into the bakery. Percival was packing up the display and looked at Harry.

“I’m not going to by anything else,” Harry promised. “Was there viagra in the muffins?”

Percival glared at him and gave Harry a two finger salute.

“Fine, some natural enhancement of some sort?” Harry pressed.

Percival rolled his eyes and stomped to the back of the shop and came back a few minutes later with what looked like a shelf from an old library index card case. He flipped through it and pulled three cards out and put them on the table.

Recipe cards for the muffins, scones, and the mini gingerbread loaves. Percival paused and held up a finger. He left and came back with a stout bottle and pointed between it and the gingerbread recipe.

“Well, I do enjoy a fine stout, but it has never caused an erection,” Harry answered. He tilted his head. “Well once before, but that I am more likely to blame on Errol Flynn.”

For once it was Percival and not Harry who looked confused.

Harry shrugged. “Parents were out, I nicked one of my father’s beers, and was watching old movies. Errol Flynn swashbuckling was rather when I realized men were quite attractive.” Harry looked at Percival and smiled. “You remind me a bit of him.”

Percival couldn’t even begin to respond to that and put the cards away and took it to the back. He stayed in the kitchen for a few minutes and hoped Harry left. But he never heard the bell. Finally he went back out front and there was Harry still waiting.

Percival held his hands up in a vague ‘what’ gesture.

“Just tell me what is going on,” Harry said.

Percival shook his head no. 

“One short conversation, an explanation, anything,” Harry pleaded. “Surely you can manage a few words. It isn’t that hard. You open your mouth and then sounds come out.” Harry paused. The man didn’t look mad. He looked wounded. “Percy?” Harry knew enough to realize he had put his foot in it somehow. “Roxy said you were likely out of words for the day. What did she mean?”

Percival opened his mouth and it was clear he was saying words but there was no sound. He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. He opened his eyes and his mouth but then snapped it shut and shook his head. He moved around the counter and held the door open for Harry and pointed to the clock.

The business was closed.

Harry decided not to press anymore that night. He walked to the door and looked at the baker. “Goodnight, Percy. Sweet dreams,” he said.

“Dreams caused this mess,” Percival managed to whisper. He gave Harry a push out the door and locked it.

The two men looked at each other through the glass as Harry realized that the man had actually spoken to him. Percival ignored Harry and went back to cleaning the cases. He had to ignore Harry quite a bit as the man stood on the other side of the glass and watched Percival for several minutes before walking away.

Percival went through his evening routine and turned the lights out at the usual time.

He had no idea if he wanted to remember his dreams or not.


	4. Chapter 4

“Tell me again why I am helping you?” Harry said. It was 9 at night, and he was helping Eggsy hang fake spiders on fish net. 

“Need to get ready for the Halloween party,” Eggsy said.

“You have staff,” Harry replied but kept hanging spiders. “A husband.”

“Who you know damn well is afraid of spiders, because it is your fault,,” Eggsy gave him a look. “I heard about Gerald the missing tarantula.”

Harry smiled remembering the prank from when they were twenty. “I admit nothing.”

“Right, as for my staff? I have one staff, Tilde, and she is helping Percy and Roxy. He got crazy busy with wedding and birthday cakes, and she is really good with fondant, her steady hands.” Eggsy smiled at Harry. “Besides this is helping us bond.”

“And why are we bonding?” Harry threw a sheet over a pirate mannequin. “There, ghost.”

“Ooooh oooh oooooh,” Eggsy said making the worst ghost noises ever. “And we’re bonding because we are going to be best friends.”

“You’ve just decide that?” Harry was a little nonplussed by this.

“Well, technically 2nd best friends, because you have Merlin, and I have Roxy, but you get what I mean.” Eggsy smiled at him. “You want my friendship.” He wilted a little under Harry’s gaze. “Don’t you?”

Harry looked at the young man, who worked tirelessly for the museum, and made Merlin happy, and was very sweet and kind. “I’d rather think we are friends already, but I have no objections to us becoming second best friends.”

“Brilliant,” Eggsy said. “I have to string bats from the ceiling. You go make that table look all spooky.”

Harry went over to the table and began to decorate it. The children were going to love the party. He realized how quiet it was. “Eggsy, music?”

“Sure,” Eggsy shouted down. “Give me a sec.” A few minutes later Queen was blasting through the museum’s speakers. 

Harry hummed and sang along as he worked. No person alive could resist the lure of Bohemian Rhapsody. It was almost at the fun part when there was a door buzz.

“Harry, that’s probably Roxy, with our order for tomorrow, grab it? Already paid for. I’m sort of hung up.” Indeed Eggsy was hanging upside down from his ceiling.

Harry went to the back door and opened it. “Hello, Percival,” he said. Percival nodded in greeting a large box in his hands. They stared at each other. “Dessert for the party?” 

Percival nodded again and brushed past Harry. He froze when he heard the music and glared up at the noise that he assumed was Eggsy. 

Eggsy looked down. “Sorry, mate, thought it would be Rox. You don’t have to, not tonight. Promise, won’t even tell her.”

Percival looked up at him. “Let me go!” he shouted up and proceeding to keep singing the song. He went to the table and finished decorating it as Harry had frozen still. Percival kept singing along and even rocking his head a little as he put out the trays of cookies and truffles that were well wrapped up and would still be fresh for Eggsy’s party the next day. The song end and to Percival’s relief the next singer wasn’t Queen and he was able to keep silent. He finished up and turned and Harry was just standing there jaw open staring at him. Percival clutched his empty box to his chest and stared back.

The both unfroze when an Eggsy bullet crashed into Percival’s back and hugged him tight. “Fucking proud of you, bruv. Know that would have been hard.”

“What was that?” Harry managed to ask. Percival turned bright red and shook Eggsy off and quickly left the museum. Harry looked at Eggsy. “Eggsy? He sang. I’ve heard not even 20 words out of him in the few months I’ve been here. And he sang.”

“Roxy’s rules,” Eggsy said.

“That means nothing to me.”

Eggsy tilted his head a little. “No one’s told you?”

Harry shrugged. “I’ve heard the folderal that his dessert is imbued with magic.”

“That’s legit,” Eggsy said. “And it’s more he’s magic.”

“Magic isn’t real,” Harry protested.

“Come on, Harry,” Eggsy said. “It’s a little real. No one ever talks about it, because it’s luck right? But some people have a teeny bit of magic and you know it.”

Harry looked at the cookies on the table. “My great aunt. She was the family embarrassment, at least that is what they always told me. I thought she was nice. She could make any flower bloom. No matter how dead the plant looked, she could make it bloom.”

“And Percival can put his emotions into the desserts he makes,” Eggsy said. 

“Roxy said once he wanted a way for people to understand him. And mentioned using up his words.” Harry fussed with some streamers a little.

Eggsy sighed a bit, he wasn’t sure that he was the one to tell Harry, but Percival sure as heck never would, and Roxy was so protective she might stab Harry if Harry asked wrong. “He has a speech impediment.”

Harry stopped his fussing and looked at Eggsy. “I thought he was cripplingly shy.”

“Oh, that’s in there too,” Eggsy assured Harry. “Hard to say whether the shy is because of his voice, or just shy.”

Harry frowned. “Is it -” He stopped himself. “I don’t know how to ask,” he admitted.

“Can’t remember the technical name, but it’s a phonation disorder.” Eggsy shrugged. “He was sick a lot as a kid and was intubated a bunch, guess it fucked up his vocal folds or something. He’s had a couple surgeries to correct it but there is a bunch of scarring, didn’t make much difference.”

“He shouts,” Harry said.

“Yeah, he can’t control the tone of his voice. He thinks hey this will come out in normal talking voice but then it is a whisper or shout.” Eggsy laughed a little. “Not funny I swear, but the first time he decided he liked me enough to speak to me think he meant to whisper but ended up shouting in the bar ‘Merlin was walking stiffly today, well done!’. God he was horrified, but honestly the best moment ever.” 

Harry knew a little bit about speech therapy, had even consulted once with a therapist who needed some theatrical speeches for a client to copy. “Therapies are available.”

“He’s done it, has exercises and stuff. But he’s also a quiet fellow, you know? Never helped as much as his family wanted, they hated it. So he stopped trying. The only person he tries for is Roxy. Because she just wants him happy, not ‘normal’” Eggsy sneered. “Like talking normal matters so much when you could fucking win the bake off if he ever entered.”

“Hence, Roxy’s rules.”

“He has to say two sentences a day, which he’ll get around with stuff like No is a complete sentence. And Queen. If Queen comes on the radio he has to sing along, because everyone sounds and looks like an idiot when they sing along with Queen. You can’t not make it dramatic.” Eggsy smiled. “Actually got him to do karoke once with Queen. It was brilliant.”

“He has a lovely voice,” Harry said softly.

“Harry…”

Harry looked helpless.. “I liked him before he head banged.”

“And now?”

“I fell in love instantly.”

“Aw crap,” Eggsy said.

“Indeed.”

Eggsy gave him a one armed hug. “Love’s a bitch.”

Harry nodded and snuck a cookie. It made him shiver and look over his shoulder. Horror, he had baked horror into the cookies. He looked at the note on the plate that said “for 10 and above only”

Maybe he believed in the magic a little bit after all.

**********************************************

Percival hated wedding cakes. They took a lot of work, and he had to be so careful of what he poured into them. They were when he tried to hold his emotions tightest, make the cakes as neutral as possible.

He still maintained that couple would have gotten divorced anyways, his cake wasn’t apart of the situation.

He had had Roxy taste a small sliver and she had sworn it was fine, so he began decorating it. Tilde had helped him with his other cakes but this one was a last minute order from someone he had known in high school. Percival always was a sucker.

Percival heard the doorbell in the shop but knew Roxy was out front. He hated making fondant roses and was doing his best to not put that crankiness into the cake.

“Hey, you need to come out front,” Roxy said poking her head into the back. “It’s a special order.”

“Busy,” he whispered.

“Please, bit of a difficult client I think.” Roxy disappeared. 

Percival put down his work and cleaned his hands and went out. He didn’t realize he had frosting in his hair. Roxy had gone out front and seemed to be blocking the door.

And there was Harry.

With flowers.

“Hello,” Harry said.

Percival stared at him and eventually gave a nod and ignored the flowers. He picked up his order pad and showed it to Harry and waited to write.

Harry smiled. “Next Saturday?”

Percival nodded and wrote the date in. He pointed at his watch. 

“Hmmm, 7pm would seem best for my plans,” Harry said after thinking. Percival wrote it down. He looked at Harry. “It would be dessert for a small dinner party. I’d be cooking the one nice dish I can do. Chicken Marsala, noodles, broccoli on the side.”

Percival thought about it, there were a few options. He held up his fingers trying to get Harry to say for how many people.

“Just two,” Harry said. “It’s a first date.”

Percival frowned at that. He tried not to think about why Harry having a date annoyed him. He coughed and mimed choking.

“I don’t have any allergies. And you’d know my date’s health better than I.” Harry thrust the flowers forward. 

Percival dropped the order pad. He looked at the flowers that Harry was trying to make him take.

“They’re edible. The flowers. At least that is what the florist said.” Harry let go of the bouquet and Percival managed to catch it. Harry put his hands in his pockets. “So, any allergies?”

Percival shook his head no.

“And does the menu suit?” Harry asked.

Percival swallowed. “I hate broccoli,” it was a shout and he winced.

“I can make carrots,” was all that Harry said. “Do you think you...would you like...please?” Harry asked.

Percival touched the flowers gently and smiled. He put the bouquet down gently and grabbed the order pad and wrote a few notes. He showed Harry where it asked for delivery address and Harry gave it to him. “So guaranteed delivery Saturday at 7?”

Percival nodded and picked up the bouquet and disappeared into the back. He heard the door open and his niece shout “fuck yeah!”

The wedding cake decorations made everyone think of hope and possibility when they ate it.

Percival knocked on Harry’s door with cookies that had a glaze with pieces of edible flower.

And more of that feeling of hope.


	5. Chapter 5

“You talk to him,” Merlin whispered to his husband. “You are his new best friend.”

“Second best friend,” Eggsy whispered back. “He’s yours first.”

“You are better with emotions than me,” Merlin felt triumphant with that logic. “I’m fine with the situation, the desserts are tasting great these days.”

Eggsy smacked his husband. “For you, maybe,” he growled. “Not everyone likes every biscuit and scone to taste like humiliation and failure.”

“Don’t forget the bitterness muffins,” Merlin said and winced when Eggsy hit him again. “So they didn’t hit it off on their date, that happens, lad.”

“If they didn’t hit it off Harry wouldn’t be lying down on our couch hugging my giant Pug pillow. If it was just a meh first date, the desserts wouldn’t be practically toxic. Roxy was paying people not to buy dessert today and you can’t eat it all. No amount of boxing will keep that weight off.”

“The self flagellating banana loaf was so good,” Merlin said.

“Okay gloomy gus, friends are hurting focus,” Eggsy glared at him. “Or Harry ain’t going to be the only one on a couch if you get my meaning.”

“They got your meaning in London,” Harry said. “Your concept of whispering needs some work. I wish my grad students projected as well as you were.” Harry wasn’t even looking at them. “And don’t make a smug face Merlin. Enjoying desserts baked with misery, what sort of sick freak are you?”

“Not a freak, I just have a discerning palate,” Merlin protested. He went into the room and settled into a chair across from Harry. “The happy desserts freak me out.”

“Oh you are stupid happy with your husband, why eat the grumpy desserts?”

“Because I am stupid happy with my husband. Need some of the dark stuff to keep me level.” Eggsy settled in at Merlin’s feet and hugged his leg for that.

“I’m sure it wasn’t that bad, Harry,” Eggsy offered. “But we can’t help you, unless we know.” It had been three days since their first date and neither man had said anything, but Harry had been moping on their couch every night, and the desserts at  _ Morsels _ were frankly terrifying right now.

“You two are friends with him,” Harry said, looking at them.

Eggsy shrugged. “I mean as friendly as he lets people be? We’ve sat with him at the cinema and had some pints. He’s been over for dinner, and we’ve been to his. But not like super close. He likes being alone a lot, I think. And not in the I will murder all of you way that Merlin likes to be alone, but more a ‘I like the quiet’ alone.”

Harry nodded. “My last few relationships have been with people who make me look quiet and a wallflower.”

“Didn’t the last woman you date win an Olivier?” Merlin asked. “I thought I remembered seeing you in some photos?”

“Hmmm,” Harry agreed. “But, I haven’t dated anyone shy in a couple decades. The people I’ve been with, on a first date were always ‘on’ driven to impress. And he came and stood there with a box of bisuits, in the clothes I’ve seen in him before and just...he smiled. And I burned the chicken, and babbled to fill the silence and spilled water in his lap.” Harry sighed. “And I thought maybe he’d talk more, just us on a date. But with all my screw ups, I think it just shut him down. And I didn’t want that.”

“Harry, you had to have guessed there was a chance he wouldn’t talk much, or at all,” Merlin said softly.

“I did!” Harry protested. “I...I didn’t, not really.” Harry’s shoulders slumped. “Do you know how gorgeous his smile is? And that his hair has a little bit of curl to it, just a tiny bit of wave?”

“Yeah bruv, seen him at the beach,” Eggsy answered.

Harry looked at him. “Oh god, how wonderful does he look in swim trunks?”

“I dunno. Looks like a dude. Fit?” Eggsy looked at Merlin. “He’s fit right?”

“He is very attractive yes,” Merlin agreed. “Harry ye have a couple options.”

Harry sighed in relief. Merlin would have a list. He always used to, and it always helped when Harry got himself in a tizzy. 

“One, ye can mope on our couch forever, and at a certain point we will murder you and hide you in the garden. Two, ye can decide it isn’t worth it and not buy dessert there until ye are over your crush. Three, ye can try again. And this time, try to date Percival, not who you are used to dating.”

Harry nodded. “If I choose option three, can I mope on the couch for another hour?”

“Ye can,” Merlin agreed.

“I’m glad of you,” Harry said.

Merlin just smiled and went to get himself another sadness biscuit.

******************************

“No!” Roxy said. “No you aren’t touching anything in there.” She was bodily blocking her uncle from entering his own work kitchen. “I am not wasting that much food. Eggsy has cut Merlin off, he apparently had an incredible stomach ache from gorging himself on the scones that tasted of pitiful longing. We are closed today and you aren’t touching anything.”

He glared at her and picked her up and just moved her out of his way. He went to pull a mixing bowl off the shelf and found Roxy attached to his back like a spider monkey.

“It’s fine!” he shouted. “I’m okay, it’s one bad date.” By the last word it was barely a whisper.

“You’ve had bad dates before, and didn’t make a woman start singing Tom Waits on our doorstep she was so bummed out.” Roxy slid off his back and just gave him a hug. “Want me to beat the jerk up?”

He shook his head and gave her a squeeze. He cleared his throat and then sighed when she pinched him. He knew he wasn’t supposed to, but it was a difficult habit to break. “He tried,” Percival said. “It was my fault.” He was a little depressed that that sentence came out at a perfectly normal volume; it said a little too much about him.

“It wasn’t,” she insisted.

“He didn’t know about -” Percival tapped his throat. “It was awkward.”

“He knew, Eggsy told him,” Roxy said.

Percival sighed. “Right then,” he was done talking. He moved over and when glared at him he just hoisted himself to sit on the counter. He tapped his fingers against the table.

Roxy made them some tea. “You like this guy don’t you?”

Percival nodded.

She handed him his cup when it was ready. “So what are you going to do about it?” He just shrugged. “Come on, Uncle Percy. You are the bravest one in the family, you have to have a plan.”

He stared at her in utter shock. “BRAVE?” he shouted. 

“Yeah. You’ve survived having a fucked up voice box. One that other people fucked up. You survived bullshit pressure from your parents. You didn’t stay tucked away like they wanted, you went to culinary school and took night classes in business management and made your dream happen. You have friends and me and this whole town and all the magic and love you pour into your desserts. You put yourself out there in every single cookie. Your parents wanted you to talk. You say so much every day. So, tell me Uncle Percy, what do you want to say to Harry?”

Percival felt a smile grow on his face. “Get the biscuit cutter box,” he said.

Roxy grinned in return and went to get the supplies.

************************************

“Now, then when doing Wilde, the great thing to realize is that you cannot fuck his plays up,” Harry told his class. “The man’s comedic timing remains hilarious to this day, just try to keep up with the dialogue and you will be fine.”

There was a knock and a head popped in. “Sorry, I have a delivery for Professor Hart?”

Harry was a little surprised that it came directly to his classroom, it should have gone to the offices. But he nodded. “Yes?”

The man came in and handed him the box. “Here you go sir, smells great.” He winked and left. The whole class moved forward a little.

“Well, sir, what did you get sent?” a girl asked.

“The private delivery means it was baked just for you,” another added. “Means he was only thinking of you when he made it.” They all recognized the distinctive black and gold box of  _ Morsels _ . “Ooooh,” the whole class said and stared at Harry.

Harry opened the box and stared. And then he laughed. “Bowling pins. It is bowling pin biscuits.”

“Eat it,” one boy said and soon they were all chanting it. 

Harry rolled his eyes but took a bite. He then somehow giggled and growled at the same time. It tasted like the promise of fun, and of a dare. A challenge. He had no idea how the man did that. In the box there was also a biscuit that looked like a bowling ball. The icing read  _ Ocean bowl. Thursday 8pm _ . That was tomorrow night. He took another bite of cookie and then remembered he had been in the middle of teaching and got back to Oscar Wilde.

*****************************************

The bowling alley was both dark and bright when he walked in. He had changed into casual trousers with a button down and realized he was rather overdressed, though the birthday party of 12 year olds did at least have some Sunday best in it. 

Harry went to the counter and need help figuring out what his bowling shoe size was. He hadn’t done this in forty years. His eyes then scanned the lanes and he saw Percival. Harry walked over and sat beside him. “This is interesting,” he said. 

Percival gave him a blinding grin and Harry answered in kind. He looked at the lanes all under black light and the neon glowing. “Trippy.”

“Cosmic,” Percival corrected. A little shouting in a crowded bowling alley, no one ever paid any mind to.

“Cosmic bowling. I fear I will make quite a fool of myself.” Harry looked at the lane. “Perhaps you can go first?”

Percival nodded and picked up his ball and knocked down half the pins.

“Oh thank Christ this isn’t some posturing thing where it turns out you secretly are a professional bowler,” Harry was very relieved by this.

Percival laughed even though no sound came out. “I like the nachos,” he added after a bit.

Harry smiled at that, and that Percival was talking to him. “Noxious orange not cheese cheese and horrid hot peppers from an ancient tin?” Percival nodded. “Something to look forward to.” Harry stood up and rolled a lovely gutter ball. “That was on purpose, of course, just getting a feel for the lane.”

Percival gave an understanding nod. He let his hand brush Harry’s as they switched places. After the first set they took a nacho and video game break and Harry melted when Queen came over the speakers and Percival sang along.

During their second round when they were about to switch places, Harry didn’t just brush their hands, he stopped Percival and kissed him.

The 12 year olds all whistled at them.

The dark light hid Percival’s blush and he pushed Harry towards the line. “Go on get a strike,” Percival shouted and smirked when Harry threw another gutter ball.

“I have decided this is like golf, a lower score is really what you are striving for,” Harry said haughtily.

Percival just flipped him off and won the second round as well. But he bought Harry a cornetto to make up for the loss.

“You took me on a date for 14 year olds,” Harry said looking around the room.

Percival nodded and worried maybe it had been foolish.

Harry kissed his lips that were cold from the ice cream. “It’s perfect. But I did see a dart board and I will kick your arse there.” They finished their dessert and went to their next challenge.

********************************

“Ugh, I demand a refund,” Merlin groused. “This scone tastes of romance, not apathy.”

Percival just grinned at him and shooed him out of the shop. There were no sad desserts that day.


	6. Chapter 6

“Darling,” Harry said after walking into the bakery. He smiled at Percival. “You look lovely today. Working with dark chocolate I see,” he said looking at the streaks on the apron. 

Percival just gave him a look and a get on with it gesture.

“I just stopped in to see you,” Harry said. His grin widened at the deadpan look Percival gave him. “And I might need a few things. Dress rehearsal for the students. Some encouraging snacks would be welcome. Do you have anything that smacks of pride and ambition? A willingness to succeed? An air of -”

Percival decided to ignore Harry and went into the back. Harry was still rambling when he came out. The man did like to go on. He handed him a box.

Harry looked down at it. “You really had something for that?”

Percival snorted a bit.

“What is it?” Harry opened the box and sniffed. “Hmmm, cinnamon?” He looked at Percival and waited. 

Percival knew he could write it down and Harry wouldn’t mind. “WEEE I DON’T SUCK MUFFINS,” he shouted.

“How does a muffin convey that feeling?” Harry asked. They did smell lovely.

“Easier than your pride and ambition,” Percival said the tone shifting over each word.

“I would think pride would be easy, you do such good work that I am surprised your work isn’t imbued with it,” Harry was looking at him with affection and respect.

Percival blushed under the gaze. He rang up the snacks and Harry paid. Harry leaned over the counter and kissed Percival. “I’m busy with the rehearsals. But I have an extra ticket for opening night on Saturday, you’ll come?”

Percival nodded happily.

“Excellent,” Harry gave him an extra kiss and headed out to watch his students prepare a Christmas Carol. 

**************************************

Percival carefully adjusted his tie and handed over his ticket at the door. He walked in with Roxy and Tilde beside him. He adjusted the tie again.

“Stop fussing, you look great,” Roxy said, whacking his hand. “You always wear a tie. This is not new.”

Tilde got between them and adjusted Percival’s tie and kissed his cheek. “But it is a new suit. And cut beautifully.”

“He always looks good,” Percival whispered.

“And this is his first production with the college, and you are having your first work related date. Of course you are nervous,” Tilde soothed. “You are fine. Ignore her, or we’ll bring up how she was the first time I invited her to a work function hmmm?”

“I didn’t mean to punch your boss,” Roxy muttered. “I’m getting a program.” They went into the theatre and separated, Roxy and Tilde’s seats a few rows away from him. He sat down and read the program, putting faces to the names that Harry went on about when they were having dinner.

The lights dimmed and Harry fell into the seat next to him. “This is going to be a disaster. They’ll fire me and I will have to sell my cute house and live in a box behind the bakery, living off your stale goods that have lost their magic.” Harry looked at Percival. "You look stunning by the way."

Percival just smiled. His goods never lost their magic. But he didn’t say that because one the play was clearly starting and two if he said that, Harry would say something positively lecherous. He instead just tucked his arm through Harry’s and leaned into him. Harry occasionally muttered and whispered through the first act when a student flubbed a line or something happened that Harry could only recognize. Still when the curtain came down for intermission, Harry looked pleased. 

“I have to pop in the back,” Harry said. “Come along?”

Percival nodded and followed Harry and he was beset by a couple students and Harry was reminding them of their lines and asking the stage manager something. Percival noticed a student standing in the corner and clearly panicking. He walked over and waved to them.

“I actually have lines in the next act,” she said. “And I can’t remember how to project. I am going to screw this up. This isn’t even my department. I’m in art classes, but no the bloke I’m shagging said this would bring us together and be fun and there he is basking in his Hart’s attention and not noticing that this is all bullshit,” she began to breathe heavily.

Percival stood in front of her and put his hands on her shoulders and breathed slowly. She eventually matched his breaths and began to calm down.

He swallowed and cleared his throat. “Talking is hard,” he said. He meant it to come out clear and it was a whisper. She nodded. “Professor Hart will be proud no matter what,” he said half whisper, half shout.

“He is a nice bloke,” she agreed. “I’m going to cock it up.”

“So what?” Percival asked. 

She paused. “You’re right! This ain’t my future, nothing hanging on it for me. Thanks,” she smiled at him and gave him a big hug.

Percival went back to Harry who pulled him in for a hard kiss. The students all whistled and made a fuss. Percival was bright red and fiddled with his tie when Harry let go. 

“All of you, get ready,” Harry said. He took Percival back to their seats. “Thank you,” he added.

Percival kissed Harry’s cheek and settled in and tried to stifle a yawn. He felt like such a fuddy duddy but he wasn’t often out late and he had been up earlier than usual with all the christmas orders that had been coming in. And it was dark and Harry was so warm.

Harry was watching his students intently when he felt a weight against him. He looked and saw that Percival had fallen asleep against him. He kissed the man’s head and tucked him in closer and mostly prayed that he didn’t end up snoring too loudly. Luckily the man was quiet and Harry was almost sad when the clapping at the end of the show woke the man up.

Percival was mortified, and straightened quickly. He looked at the people around him but no one was giving him the stink eye. He clapped and tried to hold himself steady. Harry must be furious. He looked at the man and Harry was smiling at him.

He leaned over, “You are very adorable when you sleep,” Harry whispered into his ear. Percival was both pleased and embarrassed. “I have to go talk to them, but can I see you home?”

Percival had ridden in with Roxy and Tilde and nodded. Harry gave him a quick kiss and disappeared backstage. He pulled out his phone and texted Roxy even though he could see her walking towards them. He held up his phone and then Roxy looked at hers and gave him a wave and she and Tilde wee off.

Percival read on his phone a little and played candy crush soda until he heard footsteps. He smiled at Harry, who was looking incredibly happy. “Good?” the shout echoed in the empty theatre and Percival ducked his head. He was done with words for the day.

Harry came over and cupped his face. “Great,” he said and kissed him. 

Percival mouthed the words  _ I’m so sorry _ to Harry, hoping he could recognize them. He did feel dreadful about falling asleep.

Harry shook his head. “I know how busy the bakery is and how early you are awake. I don’t mind and no one noticed.” He held out a hand and they walked out to Harry’s car. It was a quick drive to the shop and Percival’s flat and they sat in the car in silence and stared at each other. “Well,” Harry said. He leaned in to kiss Percival but was stopped by a hand. “I’m sorry,” he said swiftly, though a bit confused that Percival didn’t want a good night kiss.

Percival quickly typed on his phone and handed it to Harry.

_ I have to be up at 330. _

“Yes, I know, that is why I am trying to say good night,” Harry replied and handed the phone back.

Percival shook his head a bit frustrated that Harry was seeming a little dense, but then again he wasn’t being clear enough.

_ I have an extra set of pajamas. You seem like the pajama sort. _ He held the phone up.

“I am,” Harry agreed. “But I don’t follow.”

Percival gently rapped Harry on the head with the phone. “Stay the night!” He shouted and winced. 

“Oh,” Harry said. He then smiled, “I would love to.”

Percival quickly typed,  _ no sex too tired, but snuggles. Snuggles would be good _ .

“They would be fantastic.” Harry quickly backed the car up into a spot and they got out and he followed Percival upstairs. He looked around a little bit. The flat was simple and lovely full of greens and browns. It invited you to stay. And shockingly had a really shitty kitchen. 

Harry stared at the tiny space in surprise. “This is rather horrid,” he said in shock. Percival rolled his eyes and pointed downwards. “Oh, yes, I suppose you do have a rather good set up down there if you need it.” Harry rocked on his heels a little. “Why spend money on updating this when you have all that?”

Percival watched Harry. “You’re nervous,” he managed to whisper. His throat felt like gravel. He went and put the kettle on.

“Of course I am,” Harry said. “This is your space and you are protective of it, and I don’t....you don’t have to talk,” he added quickly. “I want...whatever you would do right now.”

Percival nodded and went to the bedroom and came back with pajamas for Harry. He went to the bathroom and changed and when he came back Percival was in plaid sleep trousers and an old t-shirt and pouring out some tea. Harry reached for a mug but Percival was already carrying them away. Percival put one on each side of the bed and then got in on the left side and picked up his book. He pointed to a shelf that was groaning under the weight of all the books on it. 

Harry perused the shelf and found something that appealed. He got in the other side of his bed and settled in carefully. “No biscuit with the tea?” he asked.

Percival huffed and got up and returned with one biscuit on a paper napkin. Harry took it and dunked it into the tea and popped it into his mouth. His eyes watered and he fanned his mouth. “How is a piece of shortbread that spicy?” It felt hot and arousing going all the way through him. It wasn’t flavoured spicy but just evoked that sort of overwhelmed feeling.

Percival wouldn’t answer, just chuckled and got back into the bed. He drank his tea and read two chapters, yawning and drifting off the whole time. Harry gently took the book out his hands. “Time for lights out,” he said. 

Percival nodded and took a trip to the bathroom and returned and turned off his lamp. He curled under the blankets and looked at Harry.

“Will my light bother you?” Harry asked. Percival shook his head no and just kept watching Harry, pleased to have the man in his bed. “Goodnight, darling,” Harry said softly and stroked Percival’s hair until the man drifted off.

**********************************************

Roxy arrived at 6am and went into the back and stumbled to a halt.

There was her uncle sitting on the counter watching as Harry attempted to roll out biscuit dough and laughing at the poor man’s struggles. 

“Well, well, well,” Roxy said and went to pour a cup of coffee. “Am I being replaced?” she asked. The dough was horrifically uneven.

“No,” Harry said. “I’ll stick to teaching, this is not as easy as  _ someone  _ suggested,” Harry mocked glared at Percival who gave him a little wave but hopped off the counter and showed Harry how to decently use the rolling pin.

Roxy watched them as they worked together and was thrilled at how happy her uncle was.

The customers were rather pleased with how happy the biscuits tasted as well.


	7. Chapter 7

"Ho ho ho!" Eggsy shouted as he opened the door. "Happy Christmas!" He was wearing a santa hat and an ugly sweater that lit up. Eggsy himself was pretty lit up.

"Merlin made the eggnog, I am guessing," Harry replied. He remembered that egg nog. His one and only interaction with the police was because of that egg nog. God bless that egg nog. "Happy Christmas Eggsy," he said, smiling at the lad. "I brought a poinsettia. You did not want me bringing food to your potluck."

"Merlin figured," Eggsy said and took the giant plant. "Come on then, you are late." He guided Harry into their place which was full of people. He put the giant plant on the living room table. "You know a fair bit of the people here I think, and if you don't, well you're the social sort. Don't eat the desserts marked with an M!" Eggsy said before being dragged off by someone. Harry stood in the middle of the festivities and looked around. And sure enough as if decades hadn't passed he found Merlin in a corner glaring at people.

"Happy Christmas Merlin," he said when he was beside the man.

"My couch is gonna end up with a mysterious stain," Merlin grumbled. "And soon...soon Eggsy will bring out party board games."

"I enjoy those," Harry said. "Especially if they involve props."

"Of course you do." Merlin glowered a little and disappeared into the crowd returning a minute later with two plates. "Eat something, we could feed your whole college."

Harry ate a few shrimp and a couple other things and then bit into the macaron on the plate. It felt like lead in his stomach and his eyes welled as he thought of when he dog died.

"Oh shite, you got my Scrooge dessert," Merlin said, realizing he mixed up the plates. He jammed a biscuit into Harry's mouth and it tasted of chocolate and peppermint and that feeling from being a child where you tried to stay up to see Santa Claus. "Sorry, Percival makes me a few special desserts for the party. Avoid -"

"Anything marked with an M," Harry said, understanding now what Eggsy had meant.

"Hmmm, the murder chocolate truffles are great," Merlin said happily.

"You are a very sad and strange creature and you are lucky that Eggsy puts up with you," Harry said seriously.

Merlin is unrepentant. "He has really smelly feet, it's an even trade off." He smiled a little at Harry. "Eat some more food."

Harry gave him a salute and went to go mingle. It was a fun party, and he enjoyed talking with Roxy and Tilde but couldn't see Percival and was a little upset by that. He knew the man should be here.

Eggsy whistled all of a sudden and then there was Percival coming from the kitchen and carrying it an utterly stunning three layer cake that looked like a snowman. It even had a top hat. Everyone clapped and he put it on the table and then came over to Harry.

"There was a carrot nose emergency," he said loudly but he didn't flinch as the general noise of the party swallowed it up.

Harry kissed him, he was so adorable. "I ate a Scrooge dessert," he said. "Quite miserable that."

Percival shrugged. It was fun for him to make those desserts for Merlin and a good way to deal with feelings that he tended to bottle up. "The cake is happy," he whispered.

Harry went to get them a couple slices and then he talked about work that was done for the Christmas break, finally, how he was headed to London for a few days to be with family, and anything that popped into his mind. He giggled every time he took a bite of cake, somehow it tasted like absurdity.

"Right you lot -" Eggsy shouted.

"No, no don't ye dare say the words you are about to," Merlin warned.

Eggsy just covered his husband's mouth. "Charades."

Immediately everyone shouted variations of  _I get Percival._

Harry looked at his boyfriend, who was grinning. "I'm really good," Percival shouted.

"Mine?" Harry asked.

"And mine, my party I get Percival," Eggsy added in and people cursed him out. "Oi, I also get Merlin as a handicap."

"Fuck you, I'm not that bad, jump out a window," Merlin said, prying Eggsy's hand off his mouth.

"Had a third murder truffle I see," Eggsy said and kissed his cheek.

Soon there were two teams and Eggsy had a bowl filled with options.

Merlin went up first to get his turn done with. He indicated that it was a book.

"Flopping dead lobster," was what Harry could come up with.

"I hate you Eggsy and you'll never get a blow job again," Eggsy called out and everyone laughed.

"To Kill a Mockingbird," Percival said.

"Thank you," Merlin replied and sat down. But he pulled Eggsy in for a snuggle as he did so.

The teams went back and forth and Percival was kicking ass for their team, and Harry was astounded at how much he was speaking. 

Roxy leaned over. "This is like singing to Queen. One of the things he agreed to always participate in."

Harry who was holding Percival's hand brought it up to his mouth and kissed it. The next round Percival got up and the other team groaned because they knew that the team would score their points. Percival put his hand into the bowl and pulled it out. He looked what was written and gave Eggsy the most deadpan look ever. 

Eggsy snickered. "You can't blame me, had my intern write them all up, I got no clue bruv."

Percival glared at him.

Eggsy grew worried, knowing that Percival could easily flip to shy. "Do you need to switch?" Everyone always got one switch if they really needed it. 

Percival shook his head and pointed at Harry and then at the end of the sofa closer to wear the person acting had to be. Harry didn't move and he pointed again. "Oh yes," Harry said and got up. Percival nodded and his cheeks were a little red. He did the sign for category and his whole team shouted movie. He held up four fingers and then took a breath as the timer started.

For a moment he didn't move and his team was worried.

And then Harry forgot all higher brain functions as Percival began to dance rather...he couldn't find the words due to the loss of higher brain function. He thought they were playing a game, maybe? Were there other people there? How was Percival rolling his torso like that. Oh god crawling, there was crawling. There was crawling to Harry.

No one in the room was talking in utter shock at their baker dancing like a...like a...

"Magic Mike XXXL Large," Tilde shouted into the silence. 

Percival snapped himself up off the ground and nodded and grinned. He then slowly lost his smile as no one in the room seemed to be doing anything. He ducked his head.

Harry remembered that he had the capability of moving his limbs and surged up and kissed Percival. They were both gasping when Harry let go. "Eggsy lovely party, we are leaving now, aren't we Percival?" Harry asked.

Percival gave him a smile. "You want to see me do that actually taking clothes off don't you?" He went flaming red when it came out louder than he meant to. But for once he refused to let it bother him and just gave Harry a challenging look.

"No blood left in brain, you drive us somewhere, anywhere with a bed," Harry said hoarsely. "No think, only want."

Merlin snickered at that and put a boot to Harry's arse to get them moving. "No shagging in my living room," he said.

Harry finally got in motion and dragged Percival along. As far as Harry was concerned it took far too long to arrive at his house. He pulled Percival inside and stripped them both of their outer wear. He lead the man to his bedroom and then stopped. He kissed Percival. "You constantly surprise me. Stripping?"

Percival wiggled his eyebrows and Harry laughed. Percival pushed him down so Harry was sitting on the bed. He pulled his phone out and searched for a song. 

"You don't have to," Harry said. "I just want you."

Percival shook his head and music with a low thrumming bass started and he began to move his hips and Harry forgot to breathe with the loss of higher brain function.

"Merry Christmas to me," Harry said as Percival began to pull off his tie.

It was a good thing the bakery was closed the next day because Percival slept in. It had been a very long night.


	8. Chapter 8

Merlin was inside the bakery sitting at a table and looking far too happy as he drank coffee and ate a danish. Roxy had her feet up on the other table as was reading. Harry went into the shop and asked. "Do I even want to know?"

"The danish is filled with disappointment and the scones failure," Merlin said. "I'm taking a box with me when I go."

Harry sighed at his friend and looked to Roxy, "What happened, the desserts have been happy since before Christmas?" It was the end of January and the bakery had been doing a booming business with how happy everything tasted. Harry liked to think he had a part in that. The day after he had used one of this ties to last Percival to the headboard, everyone was giddy who shopped. He had been pretty giddy himself. The lowest emotion in two months in the desserts was contentment.

The only sales lost were the lack of Merlin eating stuff.

"I love my wife, Harry, you know that," Roxy said. 

"I do," he agreed.

"But she's a moron who believes in family cohesion and sharing information."

Harry blinked, "That's a little harsh."

"She wrote a Christmas letter, one of those our life for the last year things, and sent it to the family. The whole family." Roxy looked up. "Including his parents." She pointed to the back room. "They are retired to Bermuda. Guess the letter got there a little late. Anyways, they learned all about 'Percival's wonderful relationship with his new, charming boyfriend. Harry Hart.' They are visiting for a few days."

"A parent visit brings out this much emotion?" Harry asked.

"My parents suck," Percival said standing up from behind the counter where he had been counting boxes. "Hard."

Harry was surprised at that. Percival used so few words that he tried to never ever make them mean. "Darling all parents can be difficult," he said. Percival made a face at him and went back down to count.

"They want what is best for him," Roxy said. "Like they love him, but they like normal and tidy and a baker who doesn't talk isn't tidy." 

"Am I in for a grilling?" Harry asked. "Because they won't scare me off."

"They did two other guys," Percival shouted. Not seeing his face, Harry couldn't tell if that was an intention shout or not.

"Well, I have handled department chairs for years, and schools slashing arts budgets for a great deal of time. Parents are nothing compared to that," Harry said. He went around the counter and didn't care when Percival hissed at him doing that. "I'm not going anywhere." He crouched and kissed Percival's head. He then grabbed a box and packed up a few biscuits and went back around.

"You didn't pay," Roxy said.

"I'll make it up to him later," Harry promised. At his office he ate a biscuit that somehow tasted like the frustration of being grounded. If it didn't make him all squirmy and cranky he'd be impressed at how that emotion was conveyed.

****************************************

Harry got a text.  _Wheelhouse 7pm_

He replied  _what do I wear?_

He tried not to laugh when he got back the reply  _clean clothes_. Still he dressed with care once he got home from teaching, deciding on trousers and waistcoat instead of a full suit, due to the small size of the restaurant. He drove back into the heart of town and managed to find a spot a block away from the restaurant. He walked across the street, pleased he was actually on time. Percival was pacing outside in the coat Harry had bought him for Christmas. When he had seen the grey great coat with the rich blue lining he had known it would be perfect on Percival. And he had been right.

"You don't have a hat on," Harry chided. It was a little brisk that evening, and he didn't want the man to get cold. Yes, he fussed like a grandmother when in a relationship. He was aware of the fault and couldn't care.

Percival huffed at him and distracted him with a kiss.

Harry was easily distracted.

When they broke apart, Harry liked to think the flush to his cheeks wasn't all the cold air. "Are they inside?" Percival nodded. "Roxy and Tilde too?" Harry was hopeful, but didn't let his shoulders slump when he shook his head. "Right then, well I have it on good authority I am very charming. Your authority in fact," Harry smiled and Percival did too, just a little.

Harry followed Percival into the restaurant and to the table that had to older people at it. Percival looked a great deal like his mother. "Hello, I'm Professor Harry Hart, lately the boyfriend of Percival Morton. A pleasure to meet you," he said.

Percival's father stood and shook Harry's hand. "Charles, a pleasure." Percival mother nodded. "Francine," she said.

They all sat down and Charles had ordered a bottle of white for the table. There was small talk between three of them about what looked good on the menu and when the waitress came by, Percival pointed at the menu to Harry.

Harry nodded and opened his mouth.

"Percy, darling, it's just a few words," Francine chided. "Really, you can manage it."

Percival looked around the small restaurant where he would hate if it came out as a shout.

Harry covered his hand. "We'll have the platter for two," he said. He smiled at Percival's parents. "Don't need two people to say one order." Harry felt Percival move his hand to give Harry's a squeeze. Harry decided to not let go until he had to. "So tell me about Bermuda, I've never been."

The conversation required prodding but never fell flat and Percival didn't say a word, no matter how his mother tried to push him. At the end of the meal Harry offered to pay, but Charles beat him to it. "Next meal Harry, we're here for a few days before we go to London for a week, see my brother." They get up and outside the small restaurant Percival hugs his parents who are staying at a hotel within walking distance. Harry watched his boyfriend carefully.

"Want me to come to yours or do you want to wallow so that Merlin will again be your primary customer tomorrow." Percival looked at his watch. "I know, getting late for the horizontal tango, but snuggles are good." Harry held out his hand and was happy when Percival took it and nodded. They went through the evening routine they did when Harry stayed over and Percival's light went out.

Harry kept reading with the small lamp on and stroked Percival's hair.

"I had a sweet voice," Percival said. Harry went very still. "I liked to sing." Harry could tell Percival was doing everything he could to make the words come out as a whisper. He could see even in the low light how he was struggling. "And then -" Percival shook his head and stopped talking.

"Eggsy said your family wanted you to continue therapies and you didn't."

Percival nodded. He looked up at Harry worried. He bit his lip. "Do you want me to talk more?" This time he lost control of the words and shouted in the middle.

"No, not if you don't want to," Harry said immediately. "I talk enough for both of us." Percival looked a little doubtful. Harry snuggled down and turned out his light. "Fine, I will admit you could shout 'Harry you sex god you' a little more during sex." Harry's heart ache at the actual giggle that came out of Percival with that. He had heard him laugh maybe three times before this. "I just want you to be you," Harry whispered.

"I want you to be you with less blanket hogging," Percival said.

"That I am afraid is non-negotiable," Harry said and kissed Percival and pulled him close. "Make happy desserts tomorrow darling. I promise only sweet dreams for you in my arms."

Percival burrowed into Harry's arms.

**************************************************

"Professor Hart?" Francine knocked on his door. "Do you have a few minutes?"

"I do," Harry said and stood up, gesturing to a chair. "These are office hours, not that students ever take advantage." He sat behind his desk. "How can I help you?"

"Convince my son to go back to therapy," she said immediately. "I think he'll listen to you in a way he doesn't to us anymore."

"He has Roxy's rules and he always obeys them," Harry said.

Francine paused ready to say something but this confused her. "I don't understand."

Harry looked at her. "Roxy's Rules of Vocal Engagement. We all have a copy."

"I don't."

"2 full sentences a day, he must sing along when Queen comes on the radio, he is to play charades if the game happens at a social function and has to cheer like a loon at 3 sporting events a year."

Francine didn't know whether to laugh or be upset. "Why didn't I know about this?"

"Probably because you are the sort who came to a man's office that you've only met once in a bid to get him to agree with you on what is best for your son."

"Do you know him better than me?" she asked. 

"I know who he is currently better than you do probably," he said. "I see him at least 5 times a week. You are what twice a year?"

They stared at each other. "Well, surely it goes poorly for your career if your partner can't be social like you need them to be."

Harry snorted. "I provide the office with free baked goods filled with happiness, ambition, and occasionally lust. I get thank you bouquets quite regularly. I think a baby is being named after me for what emotions he put into the monkey bread that one day."

"So you believe about the magic biscuits?"

"You don't?"

"He could be influencing politicians, shaping the world with his gift, and he puts it into challah bread."

Harry looked at her and nodded. "Right, come along."

"I'm sorry?" Francine asked.

"Come along, out," Harry repeated and scooted her out of the office. They went down the hall and he spoke to the department secretary and they left the college. "Have Charles meet us at the bakery," he said. They walked down to the bakery and when they passed Merlin's shop, he was just heading out. He took one look at Harry and grabbed the cricket bat by the door.

"Where?" was all he asked.

"Not that sort of trouble," Harry said. Francine looked appalled. Merlin put the bat up and his back in an hour sign and followed Harry into the bakery.

Roxy was at the till. "Hey Merlin, out of your favs, sorry, Harry put him in too good a mood."

Merlin just shook his head.

"Uncle Percy, your luhver is here," she called drawing out the word grossly. "Hey Aunt Francine."

"Roxanne," she said. "A cup of tea?"

Roxy nodded and went to the electric kettle by the coffee maker. Percy came out the back and saw the three gathered.  _Oh crap,_ was all he could think. He looked at Harry who smiled blandly. "A croissant darling?" Harry asked.

Percival shook his head and gave Harry a small strudel. Harry bit in and smiled slowly. "Promise, it tastes like a happy promise." He bit in again and licked when Percival's thumb tried to clean off crumbs. Merlin had no clue what was going on and decided to go near to Roxy away from whatever was going to happen but not wanting to leave his friends.

A couple minutes later Charles hurried in. "What's wrong?" he asked out of breath.

Percival frowned and helped his father to a chair and got him some water. "Explain," he said looking between his mother and Harry.

Francine shrugged a little unsure herself. This was not the common reaction when she spoke to Percy's boyfriends.

"Your mother came by my office, to enlist my aid in fixing you," Harry said. "I won't have conversations about your well being and happiness without you present. I won't have lies or secrets between us."

"Noble arsehole," Merlin coughed into his hand and Roxy stuffed a biscuit in his mouth to shut him up.

"Francine," Charles sighed. "We agreed this trip would be different."

"Yes and you could tell from one dinner that this boyfriend is different too!" she snapped. "You can tell Percy is in love, or at least infatuation and affection. So I thought maybe this time, a little nudge and it would work! That he would want to be good for his boyfriend and get fixed!"

"I'm not broken!" Percival shouted. He bit his lip. Harry reached for him, and Percival stepped back. "I don't want to be fixed! I'm good. I have my shop and Roxy and friends," he was trying to suck air in, his throat felt on fire and the words were shifting from whispers to shouts and for once he didn't care. "I have Harry. We bowl on Thursdays and I do karaoke with Eggsy every other month. I make people happy and in love and sad and whatever else with my dessert. I'm magic Mum!" Percival could feel his throat catching, knew not much more would come out. "Why can't you just believe I'm okay?"

Francine was almost in tears. "Because I want the best for you darling."

Percival pointed to his display case, to Roxy, to Merlin, and put his hand over Harry's heart. "Mum, I have the best." He shook his head and went through to the back kitchen. Roxy followed him in. Merlin stole an extra cup of coffee and gave Harry's shoulder a squeeze. "He is an incredible man and we all adore him," Merlin commented. "If his his vocal chords weren't damaged, he'd be the quiet sort. Nothing wrong with that. Quiet sorts get shit done."

Harry snorted at that a bit as Merlin left. "I get it," Harry said to them. Charles was holding Francine's hand. "I do, the problem is you are fixing something that isn't broken. A little worn or dented perhaps, but certainly not broken."

Charles gave him a respectful nod. "Thank you, Harry. We're going back to our hotel now." He helped his wife up and they quietly left. 

Harry went in back where Percival was whisking egg whites for meringue by hand, his movements scarily fast and a bit vicious. Roxy looked at him and quietly went back out front.

"Well that wasn't the Harry is a sex god I asked for, but it was pretty impressive."

Percival tried to point at Harry but in his mood forgot what he was doing and it flung meringue all over Harry. Both men stared at the white dripping down the front of Harry's grey suit. Percival began to laugh helplessly.

"Four," Harry said quietly. Percival stopped laughing and stared at him in confusion. "Four times you've let yourself laugh out loud with me." Harry went to the sink and tried his best to clean himself off. Percival put down his bowl and went over and cupped Harry's face. He kissed him. 

"If you asked -" Percival began.

Harry put a finger to Percival's lips. "I never will," he said softly. "Your vocal chords, your life, your choice." Harry tilted his forehead against Percival. "May I just...could I add to your list?" Harry took a breath, worried he was asking too much. "When it is you and I, never stifle your laugh. I don't care how small or loud it comes out. I like it all." He closed his eyes, terrified.

Percival just whispered, "okay." They stayed standing in the kitchen like that for a while, until Percival stepped back to rescue the meringue that hadn't gone on Harry.

**********************************************

He was 15 minutes late down to his kitchen, Harry in his bed a little too much of a distraction. He frowned when he realized the lights were on. He stepped in cautiously and tensed when he saw his mother. She was stirring something and had cookie sheets laid out. 

"Your grandmother's chocolate crinkles," she said. "She was so proud that you inherited her touch for dough, that you had 'the hands'. I certainly never did, these are all I can make."

Percival went to his breads to get them ready for the second rise, while she talked about his grandmother. "I'm proud of you too," she said. "I keep forgetting to tell you that, and I think next time I will, and then you don't talk and I worry about that, and I forget to tell you I am proud of you. What kind of mother am I that I forget that?" She scooped dough out. "Your father yelled at me quite a bit last night. Said we've broken our relationship with you for too long and that we need to change before you cut us out of your life completely."

Percival poured some coffee for himself. He had no idea what to do. This script was different from anything that they had said before.

"It was my fault," she said. "Every kid gets sore throats, and I was told I was worrying too much. But I knew, I knew it was more and I didn't push, and then you were sick and they kept working on you and your chords got hurt. If I had just taken you to the doctor more, or earlier." She wiped away a tear. "I wanted you to fix it, because I didn't." She put a tray into an oven.

Percival touched her hand on the door and they closed it and then he pulled her into a hug. "I'm sorry, Mum," he said.

"I am so sorry," she said. "I am." It was a little too much emotion for them both though and they separated. She poured herself a cup and talked while Percival worked. And it wound its way back to Harry. "I like him. Balls to do what he did. Do you really bowl?"

Percival grinned and nodded.

"Shirts and everything?"

"Trying to convince him," he said.

"I'll want a picture for the mantle when you get him in one," she said. Percival looked at her in surprise. She had never asked for a picture of the others, not even James. "This one is staying, I've got a feeling." Percival shrugged not wanting to jinx it. "He'll be around, Percy," she promised.

Percival worked some more and Roxy walked in and froze. She looked between the two. "So... Merlin our only business today?" she asked figuring the woman had been here for another round of make Percival feel like shit. Percival handed her a sweet bun and Roxy tasted it. "Oh," she said. "Forgiveness." She ate another bite. "Shit, I need to forgive Tilde for sending that Christmas letter." She pulled out her phone and went to the front for some privacy.

"Your father and I are heading to London today," Francine said.

"I'll miss you," Percival said.

"You said three sentences to me." Francine hugged him tight. "Thank you darling."

Percival nodded. She left him be to go back to the hotel to pack.

Percival didn't say anything for three days after they left, worn out from the talking.

Harry made him gallons of soothing tea with honey.

Percival didn't talk.

But he did laugh twice at Harry's horrible jokes.

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

Harry got a text of February 12th  _do not even think about talking to me until the 16th_. He responded in a completely mature fashion which was to bolt out of his office and run to the bakery. People got out of his way because of the flailing limbs and terror that was on his face. He had enough momentum that he sort of crashed into the door when he just meant to stop and open it. Percival looked up from where he was making notes on is pad and rolled his eyes. Harry saw seven people in the bakery and Roxy's hair was falling out of her always perfect ponytail.

And Harry clued in a bakery that pours emotions into its good was probably very busy for Valentine's day. He straightened his tie and smoothed his hair and gave Percival a wave and walked nonchalantly to Merlin's shop. He went in relieved that Merlin hadn't likely see his run. He went and sat in the chair next to Merlin's desk. 

"Saw ye on my security cameras," Merlin said looking up from a circuit board. "Surprised you didn't take that old lady out with your elbows."

"Shove off," Harry said. "I received a cryptic text and was worried about my relationship."

"They have double the orders they usually do," Merlin said. "Eggsy put in his early. Apparently the desserts being extra happy and loved up these days means a great deal wanting Valentine's day treats," Merlin gave Harry a look. "You did that."

"I am sure his Valentine's treats have always been exactly what people wanted," Harry said calmly.

"Sure, but now there is extra." Merlin worked a little bit more. "Don't you have class?"

Harry looked at his watch. "Oh shit," he said and took off running again. 

************************************

February 14th everyone kept checking on Harry to see if he had had any deliveries. He eventually put a sign on his door "There are no baked goods here. I am marking. Leave me alone." He was trying to read essays about staging and they were extra dreadful. There was a knock on his door. "I don't have any food," he shouted annoyed at yet another interruption.

"Would you like some?" Roxy asked after she opened the door. 

"Oh," Harry said and stood up. "I thought you would be very busy today."

"It's murder, but I needed airing out lest I kill someone who says ''dude you gotta help me out, I forgot." I think we are doing more business this year than the florist, and speaking of," Roxy handed him a bouquet. It was a mix of truffles and biscuits on sticks. "Made special just for you. Three people begged for a version of it and he shouted at them 'No that is just for Harry' and kept boxing cupcakes." Roxy looked at him. "He's really gone on you."

"I'm really gone on him," he replied. He smiled at the bouquet. "Quite thoroughly."

"I'll drown you in brownie batter if you hurt him," she said. "And I'll have Tilde give you that sad, disappointed face she does."

Harry bent and kissed her cheek. "I am glad to consider you a friend. Now go back before he is overwhelmed."

"The bakery is closed on the 15th and 16th," Roxy said. "He sleeps most of the 15th, but he'd like the company on the 16th."

"Thank you. Don't murder any one."

"No promises," she winked and left.

Harry put the bouquet on his table. He said at it and took several photos and opened the card attached.

_Harry,_

_Save the truffles for at home._

_I am fond of you._

_Percival_.

Harry after months had finally learned to listen to the man about what to eat when, and ate a cookie that looked like a daisy. It flooded him with that perfect feeling of a summer day with no worries. The marking went much more quickly after that.

**********************************************

Percival opened his door on the 16th and there was Harry. "I brought you lunch," Harry said. He held up a grocery bag. "And a Valentine's gift, if you aren't sick of that word." Percival kissed him and let him in. Harry set up sandwiches on the small kitchen table and they sat and ate and Harry told Percival about his last few days. Percival just enjoyed watching Harry. And the curried chicken salad sandwich. Harry made them tea, comfortable in Percival's kitchen and they went to the couch. Harry handed over the gift. "Here," he said.

Percival opened it carefully and then let out a bark of laughter. Inside were two bowling shirts, a very classic two tone and even had their names stitched on the front. They were perfect. He leaned over and kissed Harry. The kiss going from affectionate to hungry very quickly. Percival decided to climb into Harry's lap and they made out on the couch. 

"You probably need more rest, darling," Harry said pulling away from Percival.

"I slept for 14 hours," Percival said. "I need to fuck you." He turned bright red at the way that was shouted right in Harry's face.

Harry grinned at him. "I am very okay with that."  They went to the bedroom and Percival took Harry apart quite thoroughly and they spent the rest of the day naked.

**********************************************

"Uncle Percy?" Roxy began as they were cleaning up the kitchen and prepping a few things for the next morning. "I wanted to talk to you about the shop hours?" Percival stopped his work and looked at her. This was Roxy's very serious face. He went to a cupboard and poured them both a dram of brandy. They were busy but not crazy, St. Patrick's day was much less work than Valentine's day. He handed her the glass and he hopped up on the counter and she did the same. They clinked and sipped.

"We are closed on Mondays," she began. He nodded. "And you open and close every day." She took a breath. "And you are tired, because you want to spend time with Harry. You are wearing yourself down a bit." 

He frowned and took another sip. He had to admit that Fridays after their bowling night were a bit exhausting but it was his bakery and he couldn't let the customers down.

"So I was thinking, I had this all written down, practiced with Tilde and everything." He hugged her, knowing that whatever she said she was scared he was going to hate. "Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays we close 1 hour earlier. It won't affect business much," she said quickly. "I had Merlin crunch the numbers with me."

"Why?" he asked.

"Okay, we are open 6 days. What if...what if I got here and did the early morning prep 3 mornings a week?" 

"It needs me," he said.

"That's why we close an hour earlier those nights, you do more prep the night before and I put it together in the morning. It would be a little diluted but the magic would still be there. You open on Tuesday, then me on Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and you again on Saturday and Sunday when we do most of our business anyways." She looked at him. "You could bowl as late as you want on Thursdays then if you didn't have to be up at 3:45 on Fridays." He wasn't saying anything and it started to freak her out a little bit. "Uncle Percy?" He was still quiet. Roxy finished her drink and attacked the dishes.

She stopped when she felt herself be enveloped in a hug.

"You are my favourite thing," he said loudly. 

Roxy smiled a bit. "I need a lot of lessons on how to make bread." She felt him nod against her back.

The next morning she was there at 4:30 looking like death but armed with the death by caffeine cold press coffee Tilde had made her the night before. Percival set up stations and began to teach Roxy.

***********************************

They were in their bowling shirts and Harry finally won a game. There was strutting and dancing.

He was perfect.

"I demand a rematch," Percival shouted.

Harry blinked in confusion. He looked at his watch. "Darling it is nine, we should be heading back to your flat."

Percival smiled at him. "Roxy starts the morning work on Fridays now," he managed to say. "I don't start until 6:30. We can play more."

Harry tried to process what that meant. He was pretty sure that it was bigger than he was realizing. Percival was giving up his work to spend more time with him. On their date night.

Oh.

Ohhhhhh.

Harry walked over and cupped his face. "I love you," he said.

Percival tapped his heart and then Harry's. They stared lovingly into each other's eyes, until the cosmic bowling lights began to strobe and swirl and Queen's Fat Bottomed Girls came on the system.

The man both burst into laughter. "Perhaps this once, in honour of our profound emotional moment, the rules can be suspended and you don't have to sing along," Harry suggested.

Percival grinned, stepped away from Harry and grabbed his ball and, as per the rules, began to sing along as he threw a perfect strike.


	10. Chapter 10

Harry sat at the back of the classroom and just watched his boyfriend. He had absolutely done the right thing by booking this class for Percival. It had taken a lot of work to get him to take a whole week off from the bakery - Roxy pleading, Merlin and Eggsy encouraging, and copious amounts of blow jobs and snuggles, but here they were in Paris for a week in July. And Percival was taking a one day master class on souffles at the Cordon Bleu. Harry had paid a fortune to get Percival in and more for him to be allowed to watch, but seeing how luminous Percival was, concentrating on his work made it all worth it.

The chef was going around the room talking with the students and Harry froze when he got to Percival. Harry had made sure to mention quietly that Percival doesn't talk and kept an eye to make sure he didn't get uncomfortable. The chef took a mouthful of dark chocolate souffle and a tear fell down his cheek. The whole room gasped and Percival was blushing a little bit.

"It...it is pure happiness," the chef said in halting English. "It, it true love." He took another spoonful and sighed happily. He clapped Percival on the shoulder and continued around the room. 

When they left a few hours later Harry tucked his arm through Percival's as they walked back to their hotel. "So true love souffle, hmmm?"

"I was thinking about the movie Ratatouille," Percival said. Harry pushed him off the sidewalk and grinned when Percival laughed. They walked some more. "And you, I was thinking of you," he added.

"I can't bake my feelings into anything," Harry said.

"You can't bake, period."

"Ha ha," Harry replied. "The best thing that ever happened to me was eating your happy biscuits that one day in Eggsy's office."

Percival kissed his cheek and they went up to their hotel room to order room service, yet again.

**********************************************************

He liked his routine.

It was simple, orderly.

It was Friday so the alarm didn't go off until 5:45 and he rose and put the coffee on. He showered and dressed and kissed Harry's shoulder and poured coffee into a to go mug and drove to the bakery. Roxy was in the back working on the scones and he came in and put his apron on and got to work beside her. They opened on time, Merlin coming in and begging for coffee and rage chocodoodles and leaving with despair scones.

Harry strolled in at 8:30 for more kisses and coffee before going to the college.

The day was reasonably busy and they closed precisely at 6pm and cleaned up and Percival was back at Harry's house - no their house - at 7pm and Harry had dinner waiting for them. Harry was up to 10 different things he could cook well now.

They watched telly and Harry rambled and Percival listened.

They crawled into bed at 9:45 and Percival read until 10:15 and turned off his light. He had said two full sentences at the shop with Roxy that day, and it was a day where he felt he had gravel in his throat. But that didn't stop him from his simple orderly routine. "I love you," he said, words cracking, shouted.

"I love you too," Harry said and stroked Percival's hair until he fell asleep.

It had been a good day all in all.


End file.
